Monday, February 20, 2006

Where do babies come from???




So where do babies come from? Well, almost everyone, as a child, would have either asked their parents or formed a theory of their own. Now, as a child, I was the quiet sort and so I didn’t trouble my parents with this embarrassing question. Instead I formed a theory of my own.

I always though that the babies were already present in the woman’s tummy and would come out once they got married.

Now, not all parents are as lucky as mine.Many a time, many a parent has been put in quite a tight spot by their kids asking them about their origin.And many a parent have given varying versions of the stork theory. Now, we might be taught otherwise in our biology classes but here is a very convincing piece of research that does make you ponder!!!

- from the Institute for Stork Research and Science

Two different theories exist concerning the origin of children: the theory of Sexual reproduction, and the theory of the stork. Many people believe in the theory of sexual reproduction because they have been taught this theory at school. In reality, however, many of the world's leading scientists are in favor of the theory of the stork. If the theory of sexual reproduction is taught in schools, it must only be taught as a theory and not as the truth. Alternative theories, such as the theory of the stork, must also be taught.

Evidence supporting the theory of the stork includes the following:

1. It is a scientifically established fact that the stork does exist. This can be confirmed by every ornithologist.

2. The alleged human fetal development contains several features that the theory of sexual reproduction is unable to explain.

3. The theory of sexual reproduction implies that a child is approximately nine months old at birth. This is an absurd claim. Everyone knows that a newborn child is newborn.

4. According to the theory of sexual reproduction, children are a result of sexual intercourse. There are, however, several well documented cases where sexual intercourse has not led to the birth of a child.

5. Statistical studies in the Netherlands have indicated a positive correlation between the birth rate and the number of storks. Both are decreasing.

6. The theory of the stork can be investigated by rigorous scientific methods. The only assumption involved is that children are delivered by the stork.


Convincing, ain't it!!!

6 comments:

nivi said...

brilliant!!!

looks like you have done a llllllllloooooooooooooooooootttttt of homework for this... super educative da...

and ya.. when i was a kid i also made my own one theory about kids origin coz i was too quite when i was a kid.. i never used to talk to anyone!!(can u beleive that i was a quite kid??? but its the truth)

Anonymous said...

ok....now lemme start off wid ma bloody version...

.....u know dat i'm a chatterbox n more dan dat....u know dat where all my interest lies...right!!
so i did trouble my parents wid dis q....n my mom came up wid a nearly convincin ans...
she says," after a boy n a gal gets married...they go to da temple n stand in front of GOD n say dat they r married(i know dat GOD knows whats happenin around....) n now we wud like to hav a baby n....then he puts a child in the gals tummy n within 9 months, one comes into their hand...was convincin in ma childhood to such a great extent dat i ruled out any possibility of this intercourse thingy when i came to know thru my frenz...

ok....now to support the intercourse version....

1. jus like storks exist....humans monkeys....n even ur favourite thing, cockroaches also do exist....so ur first point becomes an invalid argument!!

2. now if u say dat there r things that r not explained then i'd say dat u havent read enough abt sex....so better stop readin all R.K.nara,hp,lotr,etc...n start off on these....it'll help u in ur near future also...

3. a newborn child is newborn....bcoz somethin is said to be alive only when it starts inhalin air....think abt it now...

4. hmmm....each time u hav a crush on some idiot....he doesnt come n hav sex wid u either....u succeed only sometimes....k

5. in india....the birth rate is increasin but the stork's population is decreasin...as far as i know...u know na ki there r exceptions everywher...eg: shilpa ali khan...

6. the theory of sex can be investigated by simple scientific methods....n u don need any assumptions also...k.

quite a long one na....even ur's tired me out!!

Shilpa Krishnan said...

nivi: yup, quite some research i did. and you a quiet kid, you must be kidding.won't fall for that blasphemous lie ever!!!

Shilpa Krishnan said...

soha: as i havel already told u once. high time u stopped calling me that.
your mom seems to have given quite a convincing theory but i am here to justify the stork theory. so here goes

1. for starters, my first point is a valid argument cos its aim is to establish that storks exist. this has to be established first itself cos it otherwise it would be difficult to prove the theory

2. i am not interested in reading about all this and shall stick to hp, r.k.narayanan et al

3. FYI, kids do breathe even in the womb (time u referred to ur bio text about that thingy called the umbilical cord). this is ofcourse considering that we assume your theory to be true

4. looks like u didn't quite understand the statement in question. it's ok. take your own time.

5. again, u get your facts wrong. the birth rate is definitely decreasing in india. pliss to refer to malayalam manorama for further info.

6. you do need loads of assumptions to investigate your theory.

Anonymous said...

k.....so i guess i need to start off once again.....i'm ready ma dear....

1. k....may be as a starter u can use it....fine no arguments for dat...

2. now if u say dat u prefer dat to dis....then its only ur ignorance.....bcoz as a human i guess, u need to learn somethin, even if u know a bit of it but not properly aware of the facts related to it...so ur ignorance itself shows ur defeat!!

3. i may be wron in what i wrote...but still prefer to stand on ma point...sayin dat somethin is said to be born(the topic currently in discussion is regardin mammals dat exist on land...so dont start sayin abt fishes now...) only when it breathes from its NOSE!!

4. i guess u meant....."each sexual intercourse did not end up in a child" na...so try readin what i wrote...ONCE AGAIN!!

5. whatever decrease of rate u r able to see in humans....is nothin in comparison to dat of storks.....i hope i'm rite dis time...

6. ya...i know i need assumptions....but we, humans prefer foolproof theories to those which comprise of assumptions as the near major part...well dis is what ppl related to science do....may be u r the other way round...

hmmm.....heavy duty for me....first of all i need to comment n on top of dat even defend.....no probs....ready to waste some time for dis........go on!!

Shilpa Krishnan said...

hmm...here's my retaliation.

1. so u agreed with me on that

2. i have learnt enough of it in my 10th standard bio lasses. thats all i need to know.

3. sometimes, even human beings tend to breathe thru their mouths. all that matters is the intake of air, not the part of the body involved in this process.

4. not all crushes are expected to end up with the people concerned "doing it". so your argument is rendered invalid

5.guess the storks are working over time then. and last i checked with the ornithology department, the rate in decrease is same in both cases.

6. as i said earlier, ur theory is not completely fool proof.